1 year after - anger management report

1 year ago I set a new year resolution to keep my anger emotion in check. I kinda forgot about it until I relook at my older post. 

You must have guessed! 

I have already internalized it! because I cannot remember my last outburst of anger. I'm calmer and not easily tipped off the edge with my emotion. I can recall the most recent episode when I'm not happy with the driving skill of a cab driver, his constant change in acceleration brought me an unwelcome friend, headache. feeling displeased and considered to voice out my comment but when I looked at the driver, he's in his sixties and its late, he's sending me home... I had a long day, maybe his day is tough too! he spoke to me nicely when I board the cab, he gave me my quiet time during the ride. his eyes always on the road, driving attentively and slowly, too slow for my liking. BUT! Maybe that's the way he knows how to drive. at least he's driving safely and not recklessly, he knows his way and do not need my guidance. I arrived home eventually, with a headache and feeling nauseous and I took awhile before I said thank you to him. the key point is, I identified I have a choice and before I tipped over to anger, I found reasons to stopped it.

I'm glad there was awareness last year which led to a resolution to change and now I have widen the gap of my neutral state with outburst of anger.

peace. :)

there's a hole in the world tonight~

the hole in my life cannot be filled with what I do/know now. something is just missing and I cannot put my finger on it. it's has become more apparent in the late twenties. with the hands of the clock ticking by the seconds, years has passed with me making no significant progress on the feeling that I seek. 

it's so tough, especially when what I'm seeking is so vague. 

firstly, I do not know if this is a search and find journey or acknowledge and change journey...

I doubt there will be an eureka moment but more of me making a decision to dare to trust myself, my instinct.